Why?

Mike Clevinger made his season debut last night against the Rays, though for the life of me I don’t know why. Manager Mickey Mouse saying that Clevinger is a pitcher “who wants the ball” doesn’t exactly help. [White Sox story in today’s Tribune] By definition, a pitcher has to want the ball in order to be a pitcher, yes? I mean, why not lose behind Nick Nastrini and Jonathan Cannon, both now back in Triple A? Clevinger is 33, so it’s not as if he’s going to be around for the long haul. Basically, he wants to put up good numbers so he can go to a contender at the trade deadline. Those numbers weren’t too good last night—two innings, six hits, four runs (three earned), four walks in an 8-2 Sox loss. But, hey, it’s early, and nothing matters with these Sox, except, of course, securing public funding for a new stadium.

Silly Season

What could be sillier than White Sox manager Mickey Mouse starting Martin Maldonado behind the plate and Maldonado responding with four strikeouts in a 5-1 Sox win over the Cardinals? Why, reading the sports pages. Like the story in the Sun-Times last week floating the possibility of trading both Luis Robert Jr. and Garrett Crochet. Substitute Micheal Kopech for t Crochet, and I get it. Robert and Kopech both young-ish, and teams might be willing to overpay at the trade deadline, assuming Robert can stay off the IL and Kopech can keep his WHIP in the neighborhood of 1.25. But Crochet? He doesn’t turn 25 until late June. His stuff reminds me of Chris Sale. Why do I say that? Well, this lefthander has a 1.01 WHIP to go with 53 strikeouts in 40.2 innings; opponents are hitting .211 against Crochet. Yesterday, he limited the Cardinals to one run on three hits over six innings, striking out six and walking none. At some point, a team has to identify building blocks and proceed from there; Crochet looks to be a foundation piece. To trade him invites a perpetual rebuild, the sort of hell the Pirates seem to be in. Then again, some people look to be OK with that. In today’s S-T, columnist Rick Morrissey urges Sox fans to “revel in a team with an opportunity to become the worst ballclub in modern history.” This is how Morrissey would get back at Jerry Reinsdorf. If that means watching more of Martin Maldonado flailing at the plate, no, thanks. I’ll take my chances working a square peg into a round hole, or waiting out Reinsdorf, whichever comes first.

Same Old Same Old

It was like old times yesterday in St. Louis with ex-Sox Lance Lynn pitching—five innings, five runs, three walks, though he did keep the ball in the park. And this being the 2024 White Sox, Lynn didn’t get the loss. One of his relievers did in a 6-5 ten-inning win for the visitors. On the plus side, Korey Lee started and had two hits with two RBIs. Naturally, Sox manager Mickey Mouse is starting Martin Maldonado behind the plate today. Lee has eight RBIs in 59 at-bats to six hits and three RBIs in 53 at-bats for Maldonado. Like they say, stupid is as stupid does.

Compare and Contrast

With last night’s 3-0 loss to the Cardinals in St. Louis, the White Sox record fell to 6-26. After 32 games, the 1962 Mets were 12-20. The Sox have been shut out nine times in 32 games. The Mets weren’t shut out until their 49th game. The Mets were managed by Casey Stengel, who was never at a loss for words. The Sox are managed by Mickey Mouse, who lacks all of the wit and wisdom of his cartoon namesake. In seven years, the Mets would go on to win their first World Series. In seven years, the Sox will be in a rebuild.

Nice Ride

Life has meaning when an attractive young woman notices you exercising. Only in this case she said, “Hey, nice bike,” instead of “nice bod.” Oh, well. I was out Tuesday and Wednesday riding my Schwinn Sports Tourer, 1972 model, on the 606. Tuesday’s ride was cut short when the new Brooks Saddle seat I installed came loose and stayed that way despite all efforts to tighten it. So, off to the Lone Gun Men Schwinn shop. No, it’s not actually called that, but it definitely gives off a little of that X-Files vibe with the three guys who are always—and I mean always—there. Someday I might even bump into Scully and Mulder. Anyway, the boss of the Gun Men took my bike and spent a good ten minutes reinstalling the seat. Then he sized it for me; with the bike in a stationary position and your butt on the seat, you should be standing on the balls of your feet. And so I was. We got to talking, and I asked the boss the difference between a Sports Tourer and a Paramount. “The difference between comfort and performance,” he answered. “The Tourer is a Cadillac, and the Paramount’s a Corvette.” Suddenly, it all made sense. I asked if there was any way I could get my Belgian-made rims to shine, and he sold me a tube of special wax made in Germany. The boss also advised me to get a high-performance car wax to protect the frame. “That’s opaque green. Schwinn only used it for one year, and you can’t find any touch-up paint. But people are going to notice that bike.” After I got those rims to sparkle, someone sure did. I’ll be spending the next few weeks trying to decide if I want to switch to a Corvette. Vroom, vroom.

Make It Stop

Another game, another bullpen meltdown, another loss, 10-5 to the Twins. How do you say, 6-25? Oh, I just did. The White Sox bullpen was handed a 4-2 lead going into the sixth inning yesterday afternoon. Five pitchers combined to give up eight runs, six earned. Shortstop Paul DeJong is hitting .216. He really can’t afford to make an error that would’ve allowed Steve Wilson to escape an inning where he’d walked the bases loaded. Then again, it may just have delayed the inevitable. On a positive note, as positive as anything with this team can be, rookie catcher Korey Lee homered and threw out two baserunners trying to steal. It’s getting harder and harder for manager Mickey Mouse to justify playing Martin Maldonado. Ditto for Chris Getz keeping Maldonado on the roster. Consider that ex-Sox first baseman Jose Abreu agreed to go to the minors in an effort to find his swing. Abreu was 7-for-71, with no homers and three RBIs for the Astros. Maldonado is hitting .100, with his three RBIs all coming on his one homer. What a difference .001 makes, I guess.

Take What You Can Get

Michael Kopech, Michael Kopech, Michael Kopech. Another appearance, another run, another loss. The White Sox have now lost six in a row to the Twins. I almost feel bad for manager Mickey Mouse; anybody in his position would call on Kopech, whose fastball is the best it’s been in three years at least. But the old saying, walks will kill you, fits here. Kopech walked the first batter in the ninth inning, and he scored what proved to be the winning run in a 6-5 game. Kopech has walked nine batters in 16.1 innings. Not good. Quite unlike Danny Mendick, who hit a two-run homerun and a double last night. Mendick is 10-for-37 since being called up. Compare that to Martin Maldonado, who started again last night for reasons beyond my comprehension. Maldonado is 5-for-50, and to say his defense is not on a par with Mendick’s would be an understatement. So, it goes, just like you’d expect for a team 6-24