Sort Of

Well, things went according to plan yesterday, sort of. Jonathan Cannon pitched 5.2 innings of three-hit ball. If only two of the hits weren’t homeruns, speaking of which, the White Sox hit four on their way to an 11-3 win over the Rockies. It was a team-leading number fifteen for shortstop Paul DeJong, and the more the merrier, I say. DeJong reminds me of Dayan Viciedo, who would swing and miss at the same pitch eight times and then hit it for extra bases the next three times before going back to swinging and missing. Will the real Paul DeJong please stand up? Oops, that is the real Paul DeJong, a career .230 hitter who just so happens to have amassed 131 homers along the way. Maybe the Dodgers could use him with Mookie Betts out. Lenyn Sosa also homered, but he’s going to have to do that a lot more to be considered an option at third base; a .218 BA with three homers and eleven RBIs in 124 at-bats doesn’t exactly scream Robin Ventura, or Pete Ward, for that matter. Put up or move on, young man. Korey Lee connected for his eighth homer of the season, which is nice, given that he’s batting .198 over his last 30 games. The soon-to-be 26-year old has a strong arm and looks to be bonding with Cannon and Drew Thorpe, so, he’s a keeper. Yes? Last and certainly not least of the four homer-hitters yesterday is Luis Robert Jr., who clubbed a ball 470 feet to left center in the sixth inning; Robert also walked and struck out three times. Keep or trade? That, my friends, is the question. Robert is Eloy Jimenez-Lite when it comes to injuries, as evidenced by his paltry 111 at-bats this season. Aside from injuries, I wonder about Robert’s comfort level on the South Side. Life is rarely easy for Latin players in the majors, and, judging from his body language both at the plate and in the dugout, Robert doesn’t appear to be any too comfortable. The right manager could change that, but Mickey Mouse isn’t the right choice to do anything other than lose on a consistent basis. Here's an idea—with Garrett Crochet pitching in today’s finale, how about another four homers? That would give me more to think about.

The Plan

If the White Sox have a plan for this rebuild (you never know), it focuses on pitching and after that maybe shortstop and catcher. For what it’s worth, that would be totally in keeping with two franchise strengths and one weakness—Ted Lyons and Billy Pierce, Luke Appling and Luis Aparicio (and Ozzie Guillen), and someone to follow in the footsteps of Carlton Fisk, and A.J. Pierzynsk, even. Last night featured the pitching part of the plan with Drew Thorpe one pitch away from six shutout innings against the Rockies. A misplaced change to Brenton Doyle cost Thorpe two runs, but not the victory with the likes of Tommy Pham and Paul DeJong sparking a four-run rally in the bottom of the sixth for a 5-3. Mercy. Today, fellow rookie Jonathan Cannon takes the mound and Korey Lee, not Martin Maldonado, catches. Looks like a plan to me.

If Just For One Day

Ex-GM Rick Hahn had the last laugh, on and for Thursday at least. Two of his rebuild foundation pieces, Luis Robert Jr. and Michael Kopech, combined to beat ex-Sox Chris Sale, a pitcher so good that is stuff still electrifies at age 35, as witnessed by the one run he gave up while striking out eleven over seven innings. Here was baseball in all its random, beautiful glory. Four journeyman Sox pitchers shut out the Braves over eight innings, setting the stage for Kopech, traded in the package of prospects Boston sent to the South Side for Sale back in 2016. Miracle of miracles, Kopech pitched over a two-out error by shortstop Paul DeJong, who seems to have gone through life fielding everything to the side, and preserve a 1-0 victory. For the second game in a row, the Sox managed all of four hits, but at least one of them was a homer off the bat of Robert, signed as an international free agent by Hahn in 2017. Robert golfed an inside slider from Sale over the fence in left for his eighth homer in an injury-plagued season. Speaking of injuries, Eloy Jimenez, another Hahn building block, looks anything but healed from his latest hamstring problem. In fact, it could be affecting his hitting. That, or the baseball gods are waiting in all their random wisdom to pick Eloy to be the hero another day.

Words Fail

Leadoff batter Shohei Ohtani homered on the sixth pitch of the ballgame, and that was enough for the Dodgers to hand the White Sox their twelfth shutout of the season, 4-0. But Mickey’s kids did manage four hits on the night, and only three of them were singles. After the game, manager Mouse opened his mouth to let words spill out; none of them made sense or explained how a professional baseball team could go 21-61, with the dog days a good month away. Heaven help us all.

Too Smart By Half

Owner of the White Sox since 1981, Jerry Reinsdorf has managed one World Series championship, nineteen years ago and counting. I’m going out on a limb here to venture his 21-60 White Sox will not rally to secure him a second title. And still he thinks he’s smart. As in bringing back Tony LaRussa to manage the Sox in 2021 and then replacing him with Mickey Mouse, the worst manager in team history. When Reinsdorf got around to cleaning house last August and parting ways with the dull duo of Kenny Williams/Rick Hahn, Reinsdorf stated the obvious, that he wouldn’t be chasing after Shohei Ohtani in free agency. Why would he when he can get Chris Flexen and Tommy Pham? Ohtani had two RBIs last night, including a leadoff homerun against Flexen, who, with that 2-7 record and 5.13 ERA reminds me of…Mike Pelfrey or Chris Volstad or Miguel Gonzalez, or, you get the drift. Ohtani has 24 homers and 60 RBIs, and Reinsdorf has fiscal discipline. Dodger 4 Sox 3. At 21-60, the Sox are two games worse than the ’62 at the halfway point of the season. Good thing that Jerry Reinsdorf is a man with a plan. I’d hate to see what his ballclub would look like if everyone were clueless.

Hemingwayesque

Ernest Hemingway had his heroes demonstrate grace under pressure. If he wrote about baseball (which he didn’t), Hemingway would’ve crafted a story where the hero is a pitcher who knows he won’t win but goes out and throws 5.2 brilliant innings in a scoreless game until his dim-witted manager pulls him. Wait, that’s just what happened to Garrett Crochet last night. Crochet against the world or, in this case, the visiting Dodgers, with Shohei Ohtani batting leadoff. Ohtani had three homeruns in his previous three games. Moreover, he feasts on White Sox pitching, with sixteen career homeruns, 36 RBIs and a .311 BA; last season, Ohtani hit seven homers against the Sox in seven games. But not last night facing the Sox lefthander. Crochet struck out Ohtani swinging to lead off the game and induced a grounder to shortstop in the third. Ohtani was hitting .453 the third time he sees a starting pitcher, but not last night. He took a called third strike. The inevitable happened in the top of the sixth with two out when the worst manager in White Sox history lifted his starter; pitch management and all. Crochet had thrown 91 pitches. Me, I give him the chance to get the next batter, which at least offered the possibility of him getting the win, assuming his team could score a run in the bottom of the inning and the bullpen could hold on. None of that happened, of course. Hemingway heroes usually get their lunch handed to them one way or another, by sharks or Fascists. If Crochet gets traded, he’d break the mold. Lucky him, unlucky us.

He Said What?

After rookie starter Drew Thorpe threw six shutout innings for his first major-league win on Saturday, a reporter asked White Sox manager Mickey Mouse why the team wouldn’t commit to inserting Thorpe into the rotation. Mouse’s response was one for the ages. “Why not? Because this is a tough league. And if you struggle to a point where it’s not beneficial to the club and you as an individual, you’ve got to go make adjustments.” [quote from story in yesterday’s Tribune] By “go,” I think it’s safe to say Mouse meant back to the minors. But the worst manager in the 125-year history of the team—the record speaks for itself—employs a different, and some might be tempted to say double, standard when it comes to catcher Martin Maldonado, he of the .088 BA and six percent caught-stealing rate. As for the sixteen wild pitches with Maldonado behind the plate, why, those must all be the fault of the pitchers, not a 37-year old human statue of a catcher. According to Mouse, Maldonado brings intangibles. That’s the thing about intangibles—you can’t quantify them. Me, I look to the fact that the Tigers, who offense has been struggling all season, racked up eleven runs on sixteen hits against the pitch-calling of Maldonado, who also went 0-for-3 with an obligatory strikeout. Funny what happened to starter Jonathan Cannon. In his three previous appearances, totaling one run over 18.2 innings, Cannon threw to Korey Lee. Yesterday, throwing to Maldonado, he gave up eight runs (five earned) on seven hits in one-plus inning. As bad as all that was, let’s not forget Eloy Jimenez, who played in his first game since May 21st, when he injured his left hamstring. The thing of it is, Jimenez still can’t run, as evidenced by the single he hit yesterday that should’ve been a double and his obvious discomfort in going from first to third on a double by Gavin Sheets (no RBI for you, Gavin). Mouse discussed Eloy’s progress with reporters before the game. And he talked out of both ends of his mouth, saying how hard it is to gauge a player’s healing while noting Jimenez was doing the things necessary to get better. “So, he’s good to go,” said the worst manager in team history—the record speaks for itself—to the TV camera. Can it get any worse than this? Yup. The Dodgers come to town tonight.

The Good, the Bad, the Dumb

Technically, I was right about Kenta Maeda; his ERA went from 6.02 to 6.00 after going 4.2 innings against the White Sox in a 5-1 Sox win. As for loss number 58, that will have to wait for another day. Sox rookie Drew Thorpe threw six shutout innings, which now gives him two good starts out of three in addition to his first big-league win. So, dreams of sugar plums and stud staffs there, especially if Jonathan Cannon can do more of the same this afternoon. Only Cannon won’t be throwing to Korey Lee, who caught Thorpe while hitting his seventh homerun of the season. Nope, it’s Martin Maldonado behind the plate today. Let’s see. Maldonado has five RBIs on the season, in 111 at-bats, vs. seven homeruns for Lee and nineteen RBIs. Yeah, let’s catch Maldonado.

57 Reasons Why, and Counting

Here are the only two things you need to know about the White Sox today—they’re 20-57, and Mickey Mouse is still their manager. After last night, you can only wonder how much time Mouse has left impersonating a professional. The team that’s on a pace to break the ’62 Met’s record for futility (40-120) was on the road in Detroit Friday, down a run at 2-1 in the top of the ninth, Paul DeJong on first and one out. Pinch-hitter Andrew Benintendi lifted a lazy fly to center fielder Matt Vierling, who caught the ball and then froze for a moment, trying to process the Marv Throneberry play taking place in front of him—DeJong thought there were two outs and was past second base when Vierling caught the ball. The Sox shortstop was still in another zip code by the time the ball came into first base to complete the game ending double play. To his credit, DeJong took the blame for the blunder. Then Mouse did his best Clarence Darrow, saying, “DeJong plays the game really hard every day. He prepares.” [quote in today’s Tribune online story] Prepared to run into a double play, maybe. Mouse has said he gets Sox fans, but here’s yet another example of him being totally clueless. Fans want accountability. Players don’t need to be humiliated, but a manager needs to hold them accountable, and do it in a way that lets fans know. Drew Thorpe gets his third major-league start today, against 36-year old Kenta Maeda, who’s sporting a 6.02 ERA. That should be going down, just like the Sox. Any bets on loss number 58, anyone?

Honoring History, When Convenient

Don’t get me wrong. I loved watching the Giants-Cardinals’ game last night, played at Rickwood Field in Birmingham. Any ballpark opened in 1910 is bound to be rich in history. Those Erector-Set light standards are a hoot, too. What bothered me, though, was the rather selective of reverence for baseball history on display throughout the broadcast. Because anything that happened at Rickwood happened at Comiskey Park, too, whether white baseball or Negro League, only Comiskey Park was home to even more history—Joe Louis becoming the first Black heavyweight champion; the East-West All Star Game; Larry Doby breaking the color line in the American League. Oh, and the White Sox and the Black Sox and players too many to name, and the Beatles. So, I’m happy this little gem of a park still exists and gets to host ballgames from time to time. Still, after all these years, I find it hard to let go of the crown jewel major league baseball let Jerry Reinsdorf destroy.

Resort Weather

Yesterday and today may be the first time in my long life that I’ve spent two consecutive days on the Chicago lakefront. You have to start some time, I guess. Yesterday, Michele and I took DuSable Lake Shore Drive north to the Sydney R. Marovitz (nee Waveland) Golf Course, abutting Lake Michigan. It’s due east of Wrigley Field, which allows camera operators during Cubs’ games to show the clubhouse/clocktower, along with sailboats racing by. The Clock Tower Café stands a few yards to the north. Trust me, this is a place to eat lunch outdoors. Don’t worry about errant golf balls. They have protective netting everywhere. With my wife getting ready to retire next month, I’m encouraging her to consider the different ways she can exercise. The woman is a fish, so swimming at the Y by us will be a big part of the mix. But Michele wants no part of biking, afraid that her husband will abandon her on some trail in the middle of nowhere. My daughter has this same fear, rooted in the time—let me emphasize here, the one time—she fell behind as a six-year old trying to keep up with Dad on his Schwinn. Walking is our compromise. And there’s no better place to walk than Chicago’s lakefront. Nature and the built environment, from golf courses to skyscrapers, impress each in their own way. In the summer, when the wind blows out of the east, you get the most refreshing of lake breezes. I’m happy to say my wife did three miles in 90-degree heat without any breeze to keep us from sweating like bears. Bears sweat, right? Then, today, I decided to do the lakefront trail. We’re in the middle of a heat wave, as in 90 degrees or more last week and this week and forever more, which ordinarily would mean no biking for me. But said wind blew out of the east, and brought fog along with it. I couldn’t see 100 feet out into the water at times or more than a quarter of a mile on land. But here’s the thing—it was so cool I wished I’d brought along a sweatshirt. Chicago weather, you gotta love it. Best of all, I did just under 38 miles without once thinking about Mickey Mouse or the owner who employs him.

Almost

If White Sox rookie righthander Jonathan Cannon had recorded just one more out, his first major-league win would’ve been a complete-game shutout against the Astros last night. The Sox still managed a 2-0 win. Manager Mickey Mouse going to the bullpen for John Brebbia—which he was right to do, with the tying runs on base—meant the game wouldn’t go under the two-hour mark, instead finishing in 2:02. Call it a small price to pay. This is two straight plus-starts from Cannon, who now jumps ahead of fellow rookie righty Drew Thorpe as the guy to pair with Garrett Crochet. Crochet and Cannon, the opposition will want to ban ’em, or words to that effect. After the game, Mouse said, "Cannon was spectacular. [Catcher] Korey Lee and Cannon were really spectacular." [quote from story today on team website] Lee also caught the game in Seattle when Cannon gave up one run over seven innings. Imagine how much better Cannon would’ve been with Martin Maldonado behind the plate.

Twain, Robinson, Clark

Did Mark Twain in fact say that history doesn’t repeat itself but does rhyme? If not, he should have. If not, others have. Either way, I detect a rhyme between Caitlin Clark and Jackie Robinson. Clark took another flagrant foul from the Sky on Sunday, and she reacted the exact same way, whether the shot was delivered by Chennedy Carter or Angel Reese—she got up, sank her free throws and played on. If she was seething inside, the rookie guard refused to show it. Not just the sports’ world is watching how Clark handles her rough treatment by WNBA opponents. Because Clark is white and most of the WNBA is not, every game she plays gets sucked into the culture wars that dominates American life these days. Last year, those very same culture warriors couldn’t name three WNBA players, but that’s all changed. A few days ago, Jim Trotter wrote a piece in The Athletic that felt more like a detailed critique of American foreign policy during the Cold War than a sports’ column. Trotter called out the 22-year old Clark for not disavowing—quickly enough—people who want to use her to further their racial agenda. Trotter failed to consider that Clark may be following the strategy Jackie Robinson employed his rookie season in 1947. He turned the other cheek, on Branch Rickey’s orders, if just for one season. Clark is not Robinson, but there’s more than one kind of rhyme.

No, Embarrassing

So much for putting Drew Thorpe in the HOF after two starts. Number two featured eight runs, seven earned, in 3.1 innings of a 12-5 Diamondbacks’ win. But, hey, Andrew Vaughn and Lenyn Sosa must’ve been listening. Vaughn had three hits and three RBIs to push his stats to .234 and 31 while Sosa collected two hits to raise his average to .261. Again, more of the same, please. And maybe somebody can answer me this. Why exactly is Martin Maldonado still on the team? Oh, that’s right, the intangibles he brings. I assume that includes yesterday, when the pitches he called led to twelve runs and the defense he exhibited turned into a catcher’s interference call along with a stolen base. At the plate, Maldonado went 0-for-3 with a walk and two strikeouts, leaving him with an .083 BA in 108 at-bats. It's sad, no funny. No, sad.

Big-little

The White Sox notched their nineteenth win last night beating the Diamondbacks 9-2 That represents 5.26 percent of their season’s total, so it’s both a very big and a very sad thing. The sad speaks for itself, which leaves the big, such as it is. The other day, I stated the opinion the Sox lineup included only two players of value, catcher Korey Lee and centerfielder Luis Robert Jr. I overlooked, sort of, first baseman Andrew Vaughn. You decide. Vaughn, who turned 26 in April, plays a nice first base. In his first three seasons, he increased his RBI total from 46 to 78 to 80, all of which suggested this would be his breakout year. Instead, he’s hitting .227 with nine homers and 28 RBIs, and those figures are all up because of a .340 BA in June. In each of his first three seasons, Vaughn has slumped noticeably the last six weeks of the season. More .340 and less slump will make him a keeper. Third baseman Lenyn Sosa? Let’s pretend I’m from Missouri; the 24-year old has got to show me. Sosa has upped his BA from .201 last year to .250 as of last night, when he collected three hits, including a double and three-run homer. More of the same, please. Speaking of which, rookie Drew Thorpe gets his second start today in Arizona. If he comes close to repeating what he did in Seattle, the Sox win total this Father’s Day won’t be quite so embarrassing.

Flush This

What do you get when you add bad pitching to a bad lineup and a bad manager. Why, a 7-1 shellacking by the Arizona Diamondbacks. Isn’t that right, Chris Flexen? At least Flexen was honest about it. “I thought my stuff was terrible. Terrible execution, especially in big moments. That’s one I’ll try to flush.” Wow, now there’s a term I don’t hear often with this team. [all quotes from today’s Tribune story posted online] And then you have manager Mickey Mouse offering, “There’s going to be games like this.” Especially with you as manager, pal. Your team is an MLB-worst 18-53, and the only reason you still have a job is the owner is prone to cutting off his nose to spite his face. The ’62 Mets were one game better at this point, by the way.

Enough Already

Off of last night, I might want to consider taking on the role of prophet; what I said would happen did happen, again. We’ll start with Garrett Crochet, who struck out thirteen Mariners last night in a game the White Sox won, 3-2 in ten innings. Seattle hitters managed two hits, two walks and one run against Crochet, who has another week to go before he turns 25. Andrew Vaughn and Luis Robert Jr. went back-to-back with solo shots in the third inning for all the Sox offense in regulation. Michael Kopech did what he does best, which, unfortunately, does not include holding a lead. Like I said, Sox in ten. Why anybody would trade this guy is beyond me. First, you won’t get full value unless a team is full-out crazy. Almost any story on Crochet mentions this is his first MLB season starting or how he’s pitched more innings this year (82.2) than in his previous three combined. Plus he had Tommy John surgery back in 2022. To which I say, fine, then keep him. If only the media agreed. Here’s Paul Sullivan in today’s Tribune, counting down the days until the “selloff of the few players with any value will commence”; Sullivan means Crochet and Robert. Over at the Sun-Times, Daryl Van Schouwen wrote Crochet “would be a prize for any contending team.” Nothing like some “attractive packages of prospects to add volume to the farm system” because, apparently, we should want all the minor-league affiliates to win their respective leagues. Over at The Athletic, Jim Bowden has just about everybody looking at Crochet and Robert along with Michael Kopech. Yesterday, Bowden wrote, “The Sox are expected to be the cover story of this year’s trade deadline.” Again, the idea is “Prospects,” prospects, prospects. Do these guys read themselves? At some point, any rebuilding team identifies the player(s) to build around. If Sullivan et al think the Sox front office see Crochet and Robert as not being worth building around, they should say that rather than droning on about prospect acquisition as if that were an end-all and be-all. Just ask Rick Hahn.

More of the Same, and Not

Another game, another one-run loss courtesy of the bullpen. Yet more proof that, outside of Korey Lee and Luis Robert Jr., The White Sox have no position players of consequence or trade value. Take Paul DeJong, please. Pitching, though, is a different story, one any fan from the 1960s is familiar with. Last night, rookie Jonathan Cannon made his fourth, and best, start of the season, throwing seven innings of one-run ball. Without Robert clubbing a pinch-hit homerun in the ninth, Cannon would’ve lost, 1-0, but the hitting heroics got the 23-year old righty off the hook while delaying the inevitable by an inning. Mariners 2-1 in ten. Cannon, Garrett Crochet and Drew Thorpe could be the foundation of a top-notch rotation. Throw in number-two prospect 20-year old lefty Noah Schultz, all 6’9” of him, and there might be cause for hope, in an Eddie Stanky sort of way. Right now, that sounds awful good to me.

Slipping into Darkness

God, this is hard. The Chicago sports media hates White Sox owner Jerry Reinsdorf, for good reason, I might add. But the abysmal play of his team allows the media to go full out in pushing extreme scenarios—Mickey Mouse stays as manager all year, Garrett Crochet and Luis Robert Jr. get traded or should get traded at the deadline. And now we have rookie starting pitcher Drew Thorpe. Who had himself a solid debut, going five innings, yielding two runs (one earned). The 23-year old righty gave up three hits and two walks while striking out four. I read somewhere that Thorpe has a violent windup that doesn’t produce an upper-90s’ fastball. What I saw was someone who could locate the ball in the strike zone and looked awfully confident out there. Thorpe left with a 3-2 lead; it should’ve been 3-1, not that it mattered. Nope, the Sox bullpen gave up three runs in the seventh for a 4-3 loss and 17-51 record on the season. John Brebbia got the loss. Why is he even pitching? Brebbia has appeared in 27 games. His 24 innings pitched translates into an 0-4 record and 6.38 ERA. He’s appeared in six games in June, last night being the only time this month he’s given up a run. All those scoreless appearances and he still has an ERA well over six. Again, why is he pitching? And why is Mouse managing? I know he’s not really managing, but, still, it’s a title of some importance. Here’s what he told reporters after the game: “It was a good ballgame, but this is probably game No. 25 where we’ve had the lead [and lost]. We’ve got to close these games out. We’ve got to find ways to do it.” [quote in story today on team website] A real manager would’ve done that long ago. And I try not to despair.

Participation Trophies

Last night in Seattle, the White Sox bullpen needed six outs to preserve a 4-1 gem by Erick Fedde. Instead, Michael Kopech and Jordan Leasure gave up a combined seven runs, capped by a grand-slam walk-off from Cal Raleigh off of Leasure. This is why the Sox record stands at an MLB-worst 17-50. At this point in their season, the ’62 Mets were 19-48. And what does manager Mickey Mouse say after the game about Kopech and Leasure? “Those two guys have battled for us all year. They’ve taken the ball in tough situations. Those guys are always pitching leverage, and that’s the job when you’re pitching on the back end.” [quote in story today on team website] I must’ve been watching a different game. This just in—MLB announces the Cy Young Award will be based on participation rather than performance. I mean, that’s how Mouse would have it, yes?

Dumb and Dumber

Dumb: White Sox play-by-play announcer John Schriffen not knowing the social-media campaign by fans to elect catcher Martin Maldonado to the All-Star team is a joke. Dumber: Manager Mickey Mouse continuing to play Maldonado. Yesterday, in the sixth inning of a tied game with the Red Sox, Boston walked Lenyn Sosa (!!) to get to Maldonado, who flied out. Then, in the bottom of the eighth with an insurance run on third base (after Sosa doubled and stole!!!), Mouse again let Maldonado bat, resulting in a strikeout and a missed opportunity that turned into a 6-4 loss in ten innings. After the game, Mouse mounted a vigorous defense of Maldonado, whose value apparently can’t be measured by a .071 BA (7-for-99 and 1-for-46 over his last fifteen games). The Red Sox stole three bases on Maldonado, by the way, which gives him a six percent caught-stealing rate (2-for-31). Go, defense. Maybe someone should tell Shcriffen and/or Mouse about Upside Down Day, when they turn the standings upside down to determine the postseason. Sox in first place!

I Say Hello...

Either out of nihilism or sadism, Chicago sportswriters keep talking about who the White Sox are likely to trade, Garrett Crochet and/or Luis Robert Jr. And I can see one or both of them going. But the dark horse candidate in my book is Gavin Sheets, hero of yesterday 6-1 win over the Red Sox. Sheets went 3-for-4 with a grand slam. On the season, the lefthanded-hitting first baseman/right fielder/DH is batting .246 with seven homeruns and 27 RBIs, but there’s more to him than that, a .348 on-base percentage in particular. Sheets has 28 walks in 191 at-bats vs. 38 strikeouts. Maybe you can teach patience at the plate and knowledge of the strike zone, maybe not. But it looks like the son of Larry Sheets has both. The short porch in right at Yankee Stadium suggests one possible destination. Even if the Yankees were to overpay for him, Sheets should stick around. He’s lefthanded, camera-friendly and dedicated to the point of making his tight-end body into an adequate outfielder; he also kept his cool during spring training, when people kept saying he’d be sent down because he still had an option left. Personally, I’d keep Sheets, Crochet and Robert while building a team around them. But what do I know?

Ending(s)

All bad things must come to an end, including fourteen-game losing streaks. White Sox 7 Red Sox 2. Garrett Crochet was pretty much unhittable over six innings, giving up two runs (one earned) on three hits and two walks against ten strikeouts. Extension, please. Clare texted while we were watching Jeopardy! to pass along that Mark Buehrle was in the broadcast booth, so I would know when to slow down TIVO and unmute the sound when he came on. As my daughter said later, sad. Buehrle said he was happy away from baseball and didn’t much follow it, instead busying himself with handyman jobs. He also let it be known that he went to the front office after the Marlins made him an offer following the 2011 season and offered to re-sign for less. Thanks but no thanks, Jerry Reinsdorf and Kenny Williams said in effect. Put aside, if you can, the pairing of Buehrle and a young Chris Sale in the same rotation and consider what the Sox did. At age 32, Buehrle pitched four more seasons, going 53-41. In 2016, his last season, he went 15-8 for the Blue Jays with four complete games, a shutout and 198.2 innings pitched. He was 36. The Sox thought they could do better with lefty John Danks, six years Buehrle’s junior. Over the next five seasons, Danks went 25-48, with ERAs between 4.71 and 7.25. Dumb bet, that. Buehrle was in the perfect situation in Chicago, close enough to his home in Missouri (interestingly, he didn’t sign with the Cardinals or Royals when he had the chance) and comfortable to the point of winning 161 games on the South Side. That includes a no-hitter and a perfect game. But the White Sox were in the midst of transitions, from Ozzie Guillen to Robin Ventura, Buehrle to Danks. Stupid is as stupid does.

Fourteen and Counting

After watching his team lose for their fourteenth straight game (by a fitting score of 14-2 to the visiting Red Sox), White Sox manager Mickey Mouse told reporters, “You know, we battled” against Boston starter Tanner Houck, who had a no-hitter through five. We must’ve been watching different games. How does scoring two runs on four hits and a walk constitute battling in any sense of the term? How does giving up fourteen runs—all earned—on 24 hits constitute battling in any sense of the term? Mouse has to be kidding, some combination of himself, reporters and fans. The Sox are 1-17 in their last eighteen games. That’s a direct reflection on Mouse, who is a direct reflection on owner Jerry Reinsdorf. Things are so bad as to be exciting.

Baker's Dozen

Another game, another lead, another loss. Reliever Michael Soroka gave up three earned runs in the seventh inning on zero hits. That’s what two walks; a balk; a hit-by-pitch; and a wild pitch can do, if you put your mind to it and also have Jared Shuster following you out of the pen. And let’s not forget Michael Kopech, who came into a tied game to start the bottom of the ninth. Two pitches later and Mike Tauchman had himself a walk-off homerun. Cubs 7 White Sox 6. That’s thirteen in a row for the Sox, tying the longest losing streak in team history. It’s the first time in a hundred years, folks. But never fear, manager Mickey Mouse is here to swat away all the dark thoughts. Mouse told reporters after this latest defeat, “Obviously this is a rivalry. And to take a 5-0 lead and a 5-1 lead and not be able to finish it is frustrating. But again, there’s no way in hell there’s blame to anybody here, especially when we are all giving the effort that this clubhouse is giving every single day to win baseball games.” [quote from today’s story on team website] No blame? Not for a balk, a hit-by-pitch, a wild pitch, a gopher ball with the game on the line? Maybe Mouse meant to say we’re all in hell watching this godawful mess. Whatever. Tonight, Mouse and the boys go after loss number fourteen. We’re talking history here.

Twelve the Hard Way

Mickey and his boys must be exhausted from their game last night in Wrigley Field. Not only did they blow an early 5-0 advantage, they coughed up the lead again in the bottom of the eighth for a 7-6 loss, their twelfth straight and one short of tying the franchise record. The less said the better here. I’ll just note my daughter called at 9:30 PM to point out that two trips to the mound in the sixth inning were followed two two-run Cubs’ homeruns. “I mean, what did they talk about? Obviously, it didn’t work.” To which I replied in my “don’t worry be happy way” that this will get us that much closer to a new manager. Speaking of the future ex-manager, this is what he told reporters after the game: “Our guys really battled out there, great environment. We’ve got to close these things out.” [quote in today’s Sun-Times] Excuse me, Mick, but your guys spit the bit, twice. Before the game, speedster Duke Ellis was called up from Double-A Birmingham, where he had 34 stolen bases in 35 attempts. Mouse used Ellis to run in the top of the ninth after Oscar Colas walked for catcher Martin Maldonado. (Did I mention Mouse had Koey Lee DH’ing, which would’ve cost the Sox the DH had they tied the score or gone ahead?) Ellis stole second only to get picked off with Corey Julks up. Here's manager Polly Positive on the play: “He’s here to help us win, and he’s going to learn from this.” Or not.

The Making of an Athlete

Two months shy of his third birthday, my grandson can hit a ball off a tee with authority, thanks to his mother. Considering Clare has been pregnant with her second child since January, that’s no small feat. Leo will stand there and hit until he feels the need to shout “Homerun!” and run to the alley, after which he may turn the bat into a croquet mallet and start hitting the ball that way. Either way, he hits ball hard. Clare is forever working on his stance; for the longest time, he would crowd himself, with the result being the tee would go as far as the ball when he hit it. That’s no longer a problem. During the winter and spring, Clare and Chris took Leo to Saturday park district stuff for the wee people. One of the works saw Leo throw and said, “Your dad must be working with you,” to which Chris said, “No, it’s his mom.” In their household, different parents teach different sports. When he sees a picture of Clare playing in high school or college, Leo will say, “That’s mommy playing baseball.” He says the same of players in the NCAA Softball World Series. At some point, he’ll learn girls play a different game. But his mother will keep teaching him how to hit.

Losing It

White Sox manager Mickey Mouse has lost control of his team, assuming he ever had any. Yesterday’s eighth inning in Milwaukee confirmed it. The Sox were down 4-3, with two runners on and nobody out when a pitch from Brewers’ reliever Enoli Paredes eluded catcher William Contreras, who recovered in time to throw out pinch runner Zach Remillard at third. If Nicky Lopez had been able to lay down a bunt, it would’ve been runners on second and third with one out. Instead, Lopez doubled, to put runners on second and third with one out. Good luck and bad. The good part is obvious, the bad part that the ball bounced over the right field wall for a ground-rule double; another couple of inches and Lopez has an RBI triple. Also, there’s now one out. Next up, Corey Julks, who hit a fly to short left field. Christian Yelich nailed baserunner Tommy Pham by a good three to four feet. Sox go on to lose, 6-3, their eleventh straight loss. After the game, Pham told reporters, “It was a shallow flyball to left field. You would expect the left fielder to throw the base runner out on that play. The situation of the game, you know, [the] third base coach sends you, you’ve got to go. I’m nailed out at home, by a mile.” [quote from story in today’s Tribune] Hmm. In one sense, Pham was saying Paredes and Contreras were celebrating like it was the final out in the seventh game of the world series instead of a play that defines a terrible ballclub. But he also implied—strongly, at least to me—that third base coach Eddie Rodriguez blew it. That’s two outs on the basepaths in one inning, not to be confused with the four outs Osacr Colas made replacing Andrew Benintendi, who was put on the 10-day IL with tendonitis in his left Achilles. Before the game, Mouse told Colas this was an opportunity he needed to seize. Two strikeouts and two groundouts. A textbook performance in oh so many ways.

Counting

Garrett Crochet must be counting down the days to the end of the 2026 season, when he’ll become a free agent because, right now, he’s in pitching hell. The lefty was pulled after pitching six innings yesterday against the Brewers, who managed all of one run on five hits and a walk; Crochet struck out eight, leaving with a 3-1 lead. Enter the bullpen. Long story short, Justin Anderson and Jordan Leasure went walk happy to erase the lead while Michael Kopech lost the game in the tenth. A fitting number, that, because the South Siders have now lost ten in a row to fall to 15-44. That’s one game worse than the ’62 Mets who, despite losing seventeen in a row from May into early June, were still one game better than Mickey Mouse and company. Baby-ant steps, though. I just checked today’s lineup, and Korey Lee will be catching for the second straight game, and Martin Maldonado will be grabbing some bench. Yeah.

Analyze This

Last night, everyone at American Family Field outside of White Sox manager Mickey Mouse knew it was just a matter of time until the visitors found a way to lose their ninth game in a row. And, oh boy, did they find a way. Mickey’s kids were ahead 5-4 going into the bottom of the seventh inning when the Brew Crew hit them with a barrage of six singles and two doubles to take a 10-5 lead. The Sox bullpen, being both very bad and very generous, allowed another two runs in the eighth to complete a 12-5 pasting. Sox pitchers gave up 23 hits, eighteen singles and five doubles. Doing a spot-on impression of a deer caught in the headlights, Mouse told reporters after the game, “We have to look at the video for sure and see where we were, but look at the data and see what happened." [quote from today’s story on team website] A really good team beat a really bad team, that’s what happened. And the losing becomes all the more likely with Mouse at the helm. His infatuation with catcher Martin Maldonado is one for the ages. Maldonado went 0-for-3, dropping his batting average to .079, which is 121 points below the Mendoza Line. Not only that, Mouse has played both his catchers the past two games. Why does that matter? Well, if the game is in the late innings and Maldonado is due up, Mouse all of a sudden wakes up to the reality his catcher isn’t going to get a hit; Maldonado is 0-for-his-last-25. But if you pinch-hit for Maldonado and Korey Lee is already in the game, Lee moving from DH to catcher means the Sox lose the DH. That’s exactly what happened both Wednesday and last night, though, mercifully, the pitcher’s spot never came up. Like the philosopher said, stupid is as stupid does.