Don't be a Pig

 In my fantasy world of owning the White Sox, after renovating Comiskey Park—back to mechanical scoreboards, wooden seats and unpainted brick exterior—I would’ve made 35^th and Shields into a year-round destination by lining both sides of Shields Avenue with honest-to-goodness diners.  If the Sox can’t steal free agents from the East Coast, we could still haul off its greasy-spoon icons.  Of course, I would’ve improved the menu.

No neon and aluminum for the Cubs.  No, they want an outdoor plaza at Clark and Addison where fans can tank up to their hearts’ content.  And where will all that extra urine produced go? You may well ask.  Certainly not in alleys around Wrigley Field or gangways or front yards, even.  The team and neighborhood groups continue to argue over regulating the space, and it’s pretty clear the Cubs are going all libertarian here.  Hey, I just thought of a good name—Chaos Plaza, where you can drink till you drop.